SeeingRred
I heard my story being told at a party last night. Amongst family, a few friends, and a backdrop of strangers in close proximity, I heard my story being told blaringly loud from a third-person narrative, for the very first time.
Snapping group pics and selfies, it had started off in good fun. “Memorial pic?” and a shared family memory was recalled (snicker-wink-lols). An alcohol-induced-ego-boosted wish to connect opened the floodgates. But, drunken storytellers never notice when their audiences aren’t laughing.
On one level it was funny — Big gestures, booming voices, wild antics, sensationalized storytelling. But, I wasn’t in on it. It’s like when you enter a room in the middle of the telling of a joke and you see everybody laughing, and you want to be part of it, so you smile and start to chuckle. You’re not sure where to chime in with your laugh, so you just go along, waiting for that moment of clarity, mouth hung open and ready. And you time it perfectly, so you can howl along with the rest of the crowd.
The narrative continues, triggers between dramatic pauses, eyes widened in astonishment with each hyped up punchline, because everyone wants to beat the other to the punch.
Setting the stage with jab line number one: “We all had waaaay too much to drink, wine and shots all afternoon. And she doesn’t even drink. OMG, we were sooo drunk!” Merry laughter, joined together, because everyone can relate.
Jab line #2: “We went out on the boat. We had on our life jackets. We were all caught up in the moment, having so much fun, hugging each other, singing old jams like “Up Where We Belong.” lalala
Jab line #3: “We probably shouldn’t have. We knew we shouldn’t. But, we went out on the front of the boat, right out on the tip with our legs hanging over each side as it shot through the water. We were going so fast, the wind was blowing our hair. It was so fun. We were standing up with our arms out like in The Titanic. Anything could’ve happened… If we’d hit a rock or something, we’d be telling a different story!” lol
Jab line #4: “It was the alcohol. We stopped in the middle of the lake. No anchor. Jackets slipped off. And, without thinking, the two of us jumped in for a swim.” Lol
Jab line #5: “I was screaming and telling them something was wrong, but they didn’t understand and they didn’t listen to me. F’—-N GO AND GET THEM #$@%!!! I have a sixth sense, an intuition. Sisters have this bond, y’know.” LOL
Jab line #6: “By the time we realized, the boat had drifted, and we couldn’t get back. It was really scary. It was a life-changing moment. Can you imagine? Just like that and it would’ve been two sisters gone.” LMAO
Jab line #7: “Oh my god, she was f—– up! I have never seen her so wrecked. Oh my god, we pulled you into the boat. You were so out of it. I had to carry you. You just lay there. You couldn’t walk. Do you remember you couldn’t get out of the boat… and you vomited all over and I put you in the shower myself and you could barely stand up … and you peed yourself??! LMFAO
Jab after jab kept coming until the punchline: “Yeah, it was SOOO bad, she had to go to psychotherapy for it!” Quick glances my way, eyes lock with knowing, and then avert. Silence. I feel myself shrink. And the joke falls dead.
I heard my story being told at a party last night. It didn’t feel good and it didn’t feel right. It was the kind of story that you swallow down hard and cautiously let slips of breath out, one at a time, so you don’t lose it and cry.